Prince Philip turns 95: the Duke is a loyal and lovely family patriarch

In the third part of our series ahead of celebrations for the Queen’s 90th and his 95th birthday, Royal Editor Robert Jobson looks at the Duke’s role as a royal father and husband
Anwar Hussein/Getty Images
Robert Jobson8 June 2016

When asked what he thought was the secret of a successful marriage, Prince Philip paused for a moment.

Then with a sparkle in his unflinching blue eyes, he joked: “Spend plenty of time apart and have different interests.” It is typical of the one-liners he has become famous for.

But he must know a secret or two, for this November he and Her Majesty celebrate 69 years of marriage — the most enduring union of any consort to a British monarch in history.

In a letter to her parents shortly after her wedding in November 1947, Princess Elizabeth wrote that she and Philip “behave as though we had belonged to each other for years”, adding: “Philip is an angel — he is so kind and thoughtful.”

Their ambition for their marriage, she added, was to weld themselves into a “combined existence” able to withstand the shocks directed at them but “also have a positive existence for the good”. He may not be the “angel” but Philip has certainly proved a worthy match.

Prince Philip at Epsom this month with the Queen and Andrew (Rex)
Rex Features

One of the secrets of their marital success is Her Majesty’s decision to defer to him on family matters. He is the undisputed patriarch. It is a strong marriage but there have been moments of disharmony — one of their most serious came over the naming of their children.

Philip deeply resented that his children would not bear his last name. “I am the only man in the country not allowed to give his name to his own children,” he reportedly once griped. It was a longstanding bone of contention.

In 1960, Her Majesty resolved it by agreeing to change the royal family’s surname to Mountbatten-Windsor.

The decree came just in time for the birth of their third child, Prince Andrew. It was a fair compromise — as it would remain the House of Windsor in perpetuity as stipulated by George V.

The private Philip is warmer than his public persona. The Princess Royal described him as a loving father who read her bedtime stories and played “chasing games” with her.

 The Queen and Philip with Charles, Anne, Andrew and Edward at Buckingham Palace in 1970 
Corbis

“Bedtime stories are things children probably don’t get so much nowadays but were very important in my day,” she said.

The poem Hiawatha was a favourite of his. Philip is also close to his sons Andrew and Edward, particularly Edward, who took over the running of the Duke of Edinburgh’s Award.

Over the years there have been numerous reports of friction between Philip and his children, particularly Charles. A sensitive boy, Charles had a more difficult relationship with his father which has been somewhat overplayed in some quarters.

One senior former member of the royal household explained: “Yes, the Duke and Prince of Wales do have forthright discussions on areas where they disagree but that doesn’t impact upon their love and respect for one another.”

 The Duke with Princess Diana, to whom he offered advice as her marriage to Charles broke down 
Rex

The breakdown of Charles’s marriage to Princess Diana did not help relations between father and son. Philip, an outsider like the princess, tried to support his daughter-in-law, writing loving letters offering advice.

Diana replied: “Dearest Pa, I was particularly touched by your most recent letter which proved to me, if I didn’t already know it, that you really do care ... this latest letter of yours showed great understanding and tact and I hope to be able to draw on your advice in the months ahead.”

The differences between Philip and Charles first emerged in Jonathan Dimbleby’s semi-official biography in 1994. The author portrayed Philip as a bully who pressured Charles into marriage to Diana. It hurt the Duke and in 2001 those close to him got revenge.

Buckingham Palace publicly denounced a report that Philip had described his son as “precious, extravagant and lacking in the dedication and discipline he will need if he is to make a good king” — but in truth this story, by respected writer Graham Turner, rang true, especially as Turner had been given unique access to the Duke’s inner circle.

Prince Philip with his eldest son at Epsom in 1993 
Rex

There is no doubt that with time the relationship between Philip and Charles has become closer. The Prince of Wales has repeatedly praised his father in public.

During the Diamond Jubilee celebrations in 2012 Philip’s admission to King Edward VII Hospital in London meant he was forced to miss key weekend festivities.

Charles roused the crowd with a speech in praise of Her Majesty — but also his father. “The only sad thing is my father couldn’t be here,” he said.

“But if we shout loud enough, he might just hear us.” The audience started chanting “Philip! Philip! Philip!” The Queen bit her lip, letting her guard slip for just a moment.

In November 1997, marking his golden wedding anniversary at London’s Guildhall, the Duke spoke of his family with pride. “Like all families we went through the full range of the pleasures and tribulations of bringing up children.

I am naturally somewhat biased but I think our children have done rather well under very difficult and demanding circumstances, and I hope we can be forgiven for feeling proud of them.

I am also encouraged to see what a good start the next generation is making.”

Royal dadness: Princess Elizabeth with her husband and their children Charles and Anne in August 1951. 
Keystone/Getty Images

That “next generation” adores him. Prince Harry, in an interview to mark the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee in 2012, paid tribute to his grandmother’s stoicism and sense of duty, but said none of her achievements would have been possible without the unswerving support of his grandfather: “I don’t think that she could do it without him, especially when they’re both at this age.”

As Philip approaches his 95th birthday he shows no signs of slowing down as he promised on his birthday five years ago. Back then he said he reckoned he had “done my bit”. Of that there can be no doubt.

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