Arsenal and England legend Kelly Smith considered suicide after suffering leg break in 2004

Kelly Smith
David Price/Arsenal FC via Getty Images
Richard Parry8 May 2017

England Women’s legend Kelly Smith has revealed that she considered suicide as she struggled to come to terms with being injured after breaking a leg in 2004.

After becoming England’s first female professional footballer when she crossed the Atlantic to join New Jersey in 1999, she was then playing for the New Jersey Wildcats in the W-League when she sustained the injury.

Smith had missed the majority of the previous two seasons with after tearing an anterior cruciate ligament in her knee.

Struggling to cope, she soon started drinking heavily.

"I was very, very low to the point where I had suicidal thoughts,” Smith told ITV London, as part of Mental Health Awareness week.

“I remember walking around my apartment and looking at the lighting fixtures and the wardrobe fixtures and thinking could I hang a bed sheet there and hang myself. Would that hold my weight?

“Those were my deepest darkest days and they happened on a consistent basis."

Smith would return to England and Arsenal for another trophy-laden spell which saw the Gunners win three Premier League titles and, three FA Cups, the Uefa Cup and the Premier League Cup.

Smith would return to the US to play for the Boston Breakers before returning once again to Arsenal in 2012. She scored 46 times in 117 games for England between 1995 and 2015 and received an MBE in 2008.

Smith, who retired from the game earlier this year, says she wants to use her profile to encourage others to speak out.

"Even now talking about it, I'm thinking is this the right thing to do, to tell you and to tell the world. But if I can help other people along the way, because there are so many other athletes and people who go through these same things, that it's okay to talk about it, it can help other people".

Photo: Ben Hoskins/Getty Images
Ben Hoskins/Getty Images

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