Indecent exposure! Why the hell are London’s men wearing shorts in the snow?

Sub zero temperatures have hit London so why are men flaunting bare legs on the daily commute, asks Joe Bromley
Saltburn's Archie Madekwe bared all at the bracingly cold (and wet) Fashion Awards in December
Getty Images
Joe Bromley9 January 2024

Snow! In London! And still, it was far from the strangest sight on the streets as the Arctic blow battered down yesterday. 

No, instead it was the legions of men trying to keep from wincing as they shuffled themselves home and (do they have the memory of minnows?) back to work again this morning wearing shorts. It is categorically freezing — what the hell are they thinking?

I'll be the first to turn to shorts when the weather warms, but a 13-degree minimum is a good place to start. To my mind, there are only two reasons for incident exposure of knobbly knees while commuting in sub-zero climes. The first (and this includes the loons who aren’t even wearing sports shorts, just their plain old summer pair) is that they see themselves as boiling-blooded macho tanks. That's a sexy, spartan mindset, sure, but no one is hopping into bed with a sofa-bound, spluttering man-flu patient.

Ami Paris' autumn winter 2023 collection
Getty Images

Then, there are the gym dads. Must they flaunt their Christmas Under Armour shorts and pairs of HOKA runners on the Elizabeth line to validate a 2024 resolution? We get it, you can’t eat out because your shiny new Third Space membership is clawing 84 per cent of disposable income, but changing rooms and tracksuit bottoms are well integrated into society to, mutually, keep you warm and save our eyes.  So much suggests this sector of Londoners are lazy to the extent they can’t be bothered to pull an elasticated pair of shorts down, haul each leg out of their sports garments, and slot them back into the suit trousers whence they came. I mean, the city’s men have managed this since Beau Brummel set the tone in the 18th century. 

The British GQ Men Of The Year afterparty at the Royal Opera House on November 15, 2023
Getty Images

There is of course the fashion boy subsect too, a handful of whom clung onto their shorts throughout the winter party season: from November’s GQ Men Of The Year Awards to December’s bitterly cold (and wet) Fashion Awards red carpet, where Saltburn star Archie Madekwe dared to bare his pins. 

Tiny shorts were a prominent feature of the autumn / winter 2023 menswear collections, I will admit. At Ami, micro numbers were worn with ankle grazing, wool overcoats and thick socks. Maison Margiela sent out tiny red tweed iterations and at Loewe, lads wore little more than minute cycling shorts with floating blue satin shirts or electric green cardigans. 

But to say that no Paris Fashion Week vibes have emanated from culprits flashing their thighs on the Central line this January is to understate the aesthetic catastrophe and deficit of common sense. It’s an important reminder, too, that something may well limp down a catwalk, but an sensible outfit for the daily commute it does not make. 

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