Cafe Society, film review: Kristen Stewart and Jesse Eisenberg give Woody Allen their close-up

Thanks to Jesse Eisenberg’s delicately steely core the film’s best lines – all of which concern Jewishness and anti-Semitism – make a proper impression, says Charlotte O’Sullivan
Charlotte Osullivan2 September 2016

Kristen Stewart can’t choose between two adoring men. Which may sound like a summary of Twilight but also covers pretty much everything about Woody Allen’s latest film. Stewart and Allen: what a weird combo.

Those who still think of Stewart as a drippy teen queen may be surprised to see her following in the footsteps of Diane Keaton, Mia Farrow and Cate Blanchett. Conversely, those who view Blue Jasmine as an anomaly (the only truly brilliant film Allen has made since the late 1990s) could point to Stewart’s gloriously subtle turn in The Clouds of Sils Maria and claim she’s the one slumming it.

The story starts in 1930s LA, where smart, half-worldly secretary Vonnie (Stewart) breaks the heart of nebbish, naïve New Yorker Bobby (Jesse Eisenberg). Years later the pair meet again and share a special night together. Both have made compromises in their lives. But is it too late to turn back the clock?

Ach, I didn’t care either way. Allen’s script throws together familiar elements (ruthless hoodlums, respectable hypocrites, insecure film buffs) but lacks pace, belly-laughs or texture. Vonnie mostly just flashes a rueful smile, while being told she’s beautiful. Even worse, when Bobby decides to front a nightclub for his homicidal brother (Corey Stoll, wasted), we never get involved in the nitty gritty of what such a partnership might entail. Nor do sordid details (relating to various high-society sex scandals) touch us.

Last year the Coen brothers’ Hail, Caesar! covered roughly the same era and milieu. Both films capture the essence of melancholy sunbeams. Like Roger Deakins, cinematographer Vittorio Storaro (who lit Last Tango in Paris and Apocalypse Now) is a genius. Where the Coens’ pretty pictures cause brain-rush, however, Allen’s are decaffeinated to the max.

The one singular element is Eisenberg, the first Jewish actor to play a Woody Allen stand-in since Larry David in Whatever Works (2009). Thanks to Eisenberg’s delicately steely core the film’s best lines (all of which concern Jewishness and anti-Semitism) make a proper impression. Also crucial to the mix is the brilliant Blake Lively (as the fragrant bombshell who affectionately stereotypes Bobby as “pushy”).

Latest film reviews

1/99

Assimilation is a hot topic and Allen, in his own way, gets to the heart of the matter. He may be alive to the pleasures of marrying out but he wants to remind us he’s not one of the goys.

Cert 12A, 96 mins

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